Monday was a bad day.
Sometimes I start thinking about how I will never be "fixed". That this is what I have to live with the rest of my life, and I really hate it. This leads to thinking about having kids and do I really want to risk putting my children through this. No, I don't. But I've always wanted kids. So, if I do have kids does that make me selfish? Will they hate me?
I'm almost to the point where I'd be okay making the decision to not have kids. Almost. I really try not to think about it too much. But, I'm co-hosting a baby shower for a good friend later this month and I made the invitations. That's why I've been thinking about it a lot lately. Plus, I have 3 other good friends that are pregnant. And then there are all those cute pictures of new babies on several blogs I read. So, it's something I can't really avoid, and I don't want to. I just try to remember that the good days out number the bad and that tomorrow will be a good day!
tomorrow is indeed a new day, and this too, shall pass. good luck and i hope everything looks brighter in the morning.
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